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Can girls and guys be friends?


Guest Anonymous

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Platonic relationships ay? Hmm ...?

 

People think that they are possible .. but I reckon that theres always one of the two in the relationship that "would if they could"! if you get my drift?

 

Disagree strongly, me old trout. Without hearing your full justification for your reckoning i'll bite my tongue, and instead pose a scenario, 20 year old happily married guy, 60 year old happily married woman. Impossible for them to be good friends without sexual undertones?

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Without getting personal;

 

You are suggesting then that person 'A' who is friendly with similarly aged opposite sex 'B''C''D' etc. has sexual undertones with all of them?

 

I think the point i'm trying to make is that it may well be the case that sometimes people attempt to mask attraction with friendship, but that that is a clear and distinct scenario from asexual friendship, which i would say is common, natural and healthy. The opinion of the opposite sex, both ways, propagates understanding. Viva la difference, and all that.

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Guest Anonymous

I think they can: but it wont be the same type of friendship. Its hard to get too close to another woman - what will there boyfriends think? what is the agenda? its a tough one, personally, i dont have many female mates, basically because its too complicated, people always jump to conclusions: you must fancy her etc...what annoys me is people who are friends for there own ends

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Guest Anonymous
I think it is possible to have a male-female relationship between people of the same age without sexual attraction playing a part, however, I know that whenever I become friends with a male (I am female) my boyfriend makes it an issue, thus the friendship can't work.

 

well you can be my friend anytime u like - i am male and have heeps of femail friends, infact most of my palls are female, if you BF cant trust you then ditch him and find one that will!

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  • 2 weeks later...

A question here really for general comment.

 

What do Shetlinkers think are the right boundaries (if any) between male and female friends?

 

Thinking about physical contact, say, do you think it's appropriate for male-female friends to kiss, for example, on the lips or on the cheek?

 

What about if one of the friends has a boyfriend/girlfriend?

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.......hmmm.

 

Friends are friends right? So it shouldn't matter what gender they are in terms of behaviour.

 

It is okay for a male to kiss male on the cheek (thinking football here) but is it appropriate for same gender friends to kiss on the lips?

 

The exception here for opposite genders is, of course, New Year or Birthdays.

 

Physical contact? Well it depends on what is being contacted surely? :wink:

 

And as to the boyfriend/girlfriend issue, the only consideration here is the feelings of the partner, a secure partner would have no probs with a partner who is touchy/feely/huggy but i don't think anyone would be really comfortable with a partner who insists on "lip-kissing" "friends" without justification, or eg. grabbing butts! :wink:

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