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How to deal with Neddish behaviour?


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Does anyone think that sending Shetland’s neds to inner-city Glasgow or Manchester would cure them of their bravado and help them to realise that they are just tiny fish in a big pond?

I’m not referring to the regular gangs of kids that congregate at the street ‘cos they’re bored and there’s damn all else for them to do. I’m talking about the angry little swedgers that you invariably meet after chucking out time on a Friday and Saturday night. I’m sure we’ve all had our encounters with them over the years.

 

Any ideas?

 

 

( ** mod edit ** removed your signature as it was seriously long! and screwing up the formatting of the page.)

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i have noticed there has been a large increase in the "wannabe buckie brigade" but i think it's just an image at the moment as ive not actually noticed thuggery increasing, just purely the amount of burberry caps and track suits...oh and the fact their voices never go through puberty

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Kill 'em all, I say... :wink:

 

Ach, I dunno. Maybe a buckfast ban? I do think that anyone arrested for fighting (where it is obvious that they started it) needs to be penalized, especially the persistent offenders.

 

 

There are a few neds in Shetland, and with it being a relatively small place their faces (and indeed their names) are pretty much common knowledge. To this end, I see no reason why they should be allowed to intimidate and assault others, just because they may be under 18 and rifled on buckie.

 

Maybe the ‘dugs against drugs’ folk could channel some of the donations they’ve received (which I believe are currently earmarked for 3000 years worth of Pedigree chum), into a fund for the creation of a working guillotine at da cross?

 

It could be manned by a team of enthusiastic volunteers - we could maybe set up a few souvenir stalls, an outdoor bar and have Oscar Charlie circling, broadcasting live “eye in the sky†footage to a giant screen above the tourist board. Maybe we could get the Jarl squad involved, with the Jarl himself performing the final chop – let’s really make a day of it! We could get the barbecue fired up on the esplanade, which would provide both food for all the spectators and make us considerable savings on burial expenses, if you get my drift… I think I’ll stop now.

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Ally wrote

Ach, I dunno. Maybe a buckfast ban?

 

Perhaps it is time that the monks of Buckfast Abbey looked into the effects their "tonic wine" has in Scotland. Ok so the drinkers would switch to something else but I do have worries about a product coming from a monastry (or the next door factory) that causes so much misery.

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I forget where I read this...

 

But one policeman in some town or another said he favorite method of dealing with neds was to carry a standard leather glove with him and place a ball-bearing in each finger. Upon walking past a group of neds, he would make some comment about hoping they were behaving whilst clipping the head ned around the back of the head with his glove. This ned has been socked with 5 ball bearings, but to the rest of the world it looks like he is crying after being tapped with a leather glove.

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Kill 'em all, I say... :wink:

 

Ach, I dunno. Maybe a buckfast ban? I do think that anyone arrested for fighting (where it is obvious that they started it) needs to be penalized, especially the persistent offenders.

 

 

There are a few neds in Shetland, and with it being a relatively small place their faces (and indeed their names) are pretty much common knowledge. To this end, I see no reason why they should be allowed to intimidate and assault others, just because they may be under 18 and rifled on buckie.

 

Maybe the ‘dugs against drugs’ folk could channel some of the donations they’ve received (which I believe are currently earmarked for 3000 years worth of Pedigree chum), into a fund for the creation of a working guillotine at da cross?

 

It could be manned by a team of enthusiastic volunteers - we could maybe set up a few souvenir stalls, an outdoor bar and have Oscar Charlie circling, broadcasting live “eye in the sky†footage to a giant screen above the tourist board. Maybe we could get the Jarl squad involved, with the Jarl himself performing the final chop – let’s really make a day of it! We could get the barbecue fired up on the esplanade, which would provide both food for all the spectators and make us considerable savings on burial expenses, if you get my drift… I think I’ll stop now.

 

I agree with everything you've just said. :twisted:

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I took my dog to the Sands o Soond this morning.Yet again there was a pile of rubbish from a late night beach party including cans and broken bottles. At least this time they didn't leave a Somerfield trolley behind.

If my dog gets cut or bairns get injured on this bruk I will personally look for the culprits and return their bottles (buckie or otherwise) to a part of their anatomy not intended for imbibing ! With regard to Aly's comment about a guillotine at da cross, perhaps I could join in the event with my new alternative to dogs against drugs -- Alsatians against Arses !

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I think it would be a good idea if the Market cross was closed to traffic on a Saturday afternoon and a few old sets of stocks were set up!

The title of the "crime" committed would be on show for all to see!

Don Leslie's etc could sell or donate all their old rotten fruit and veg for anybody to have a quick pelt at the Neds in the stocks!

The humiliation would mabey make them think again!

 

Think of all the traffic www.visitshetland.com/lerwick2 would get then!! :lol:

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Kill 'em all, I say... :wink:

 

Ach, I dunno. Maybe a buckfast ban? I do think that anyone arrested for fighting (where it is obvious that they started it) needs to be penalized, especially the persistent offenders.

 

 

There are a few neds in Shetland, and with it being a relatively small place their faces (and indeed their names) are pretty much common knowledge. To this end, I see no reason why they should be allowed to intimidate and assault others, just because they may be under 18 and rifled on buckie.

 

Maybe the ‘dugs against drugs’ folk could channel some of the donations they’ve received (which I believe are currently earmarked for 3000 years worth of Pedigree chum), into a fund for the creation of a working guillotine at da cross?

 

It could be manned by a team of enthusiastic volunteers - we could maybe set up a few souvenir stalls, an outdoor bar and have Oscar Charlie circling, broadcasting live “eye in the sky†footage to a giant screen above the tourist board. Maybe we could get the Jarl squad involved, with the Jarl himself performing the final chop – let’s really make a day of it! We could get the barbecue fired up on the esplanade, which would provide both food for all the spectators and make us considerable savings on burial expenses, if you get my drift… I think I’ll stop now.

 

Haw u daftie, I cannae believe whit ma ears ur seeing here. Us Burberee blokes and blokettes take exemption tae discrimination fae youz as a slander upon oor character.

 

Ah huv never nutted a Viking in anger so whit wid he want tae chop ma napper aff fur. We ur a fun luvin' bunch o'scoundrels who like to see the Abbotts of Buckfast prosper,nuthin' more, nuthin' less.

 

A think an aw that if yi start a fire in on the Esplanade the Fire-Brigade wull be gettin' called pronto to avert an inferno on the waterfront.

 

The dugz against drugs huv never been asked their opinion oan the subject(A subject that has never been adressed at the dugz union meetings)

 

Wur no trying tae get on yur titz but thatz the way we are, we drink a little wine and wear expensive clothes and like to party. If it makes us social rejects then I bow to your superiority.

 

That last sentence was a load o' pish by the way. Buckfast forever :lol:

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Ally wrote
Ach, I dunno. Maybe a buckfast ban?

 

Perhaps it is time that the monks of Buckfast Abbey looked into the effects their "tonic wine" has in Scotland. Ok so the drinkers would switch to something else but I do have worries about a product coming from a monastry (or the next door factory) that causes so much misery.

 

Sad replying to my own postings but I do wonder if the Archbishop of Canterbury or the Pope......depending on which way the Monks of Buckfast Abbey lean........should consider the concept of Buckie in terms of religious orders.

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If the Lerwick police were armed with flame throwers, then im sure the neddish behaviour would stop. once they are caught, we should have a ned rehabilitation programme. Learn them how to catch cillics with a cragie wand and make liver cropping, How to use, and sharpen a tushkar, how to make a chishie and how to make a pair of riflieens etc.

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