Colin

Here's a few classics from over the years Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue. "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981 Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...? Unix IS user friendly...its just selective about who its friends are. "NT is *NOT* magic. There are *fundamental technical reasons* why it is necessary to sacrifice a young goat to your server now and then." Windows 95(n) - 32-bit extensions and graphical shell for a 16-bit patch to an 8-bit operating system originally coded for a 4-bit microprocessor, written by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition. All software is flawed. All hardware is flawed. If you haven't learned that yet, then you haven't been in tech support very long. From one of my smarter clients: "Why is something broken every time you're here?" "A computer is like an Old Testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy." "There's no problem so large it can't be solved by killing the user off, deleting their files, closing their account and and hanging the body on a pole as a warning to others" It has to be said that people with little computer knowledge should be given little computers. Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in the mud. After a while you realize the pig enjoys it. A computer programmer is someone who, when told to "Go to Hell," sees the "go to," rather than the destination, as harmful. If NT is the answer, you don't understand the question. And my all time favourite "The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck will be the day Microsoft starts making vacuum cleaners."

One of the worst of all time has to be Grandad - Clive Dunne. Feeling suicidal just thinking of it..

For some reason this reminded me of the time I was sitting in the Fishermans Arms (long ago) listening to a conversation about Venezuelan Sandjinista (did I spell that properly) rebels. Both parties to the conversation were fairly well oiled but what was enthralling the entire place was that one of them had just about the worst stutter I had ever heard.. Venezuela was bad enough but when they guy got to Sandjinista......

A guy goes to the SIC to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Have you been in local government service before?" "Yes," he says. "for three years." The interviewer says, "That will give you extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?" The guy says, "Yes. I had an accident and lost my testicles." The interviewer tells the guy he's hired, then informs him, "The hours are from 9 A.M. to 4.30 P.M. You can start tomorrow. Come in at 11 A.M." The guy is puzzled and says, "If the hours are from 9 A.M. to 4.30 P.M then why do you want me to come in at 11 A.M.?" "This is an SIC job" the interviewer says. "For the first two hours we stand around scratching our balls... no point in you coming in for that."

Saw a couple last week. Maroon 'Fleece' type jackets etc. First impression didn't inspire confidence.

Given that one local photographer has just closed his business due to lack of trade, I think it's appalling, insensitive and arrogant and those responsible should be taken to task. I might also add that, in my opinion, there are some pretty good photographers on Shetland and as for producing postcards etc. haven't Shetland Litho won awards for that sort of thing? I just can't believe that there isn't anyone locally who could have done it just as well.

Was within feet of killer whales at Eshaness one time. Out fishing with a pal when a pod of 4 came right by the boat. Most impressed.

......how this might broker peace in a war that cost over a hundred thousand lives? I did ask you not to ask.. Now everybody will want to ask...

Found this on youtube.com Don't Ask... [/url]

Your comments did not cause any offense (sorry if that was the impression I gave) and I understood that the general thrust of your post was your 'lenience'. I certainly wouldn't like you to lean(ience) on me.. I was just trying to illustrate what went on and what was done about it. Scalloway's rumour mill is always primed and it only takes a little nudge to bring it into full production. Just trying to get some of the facts out first. For what it's worth, the Hall is giving serious consideration to becoming 'over 18 only'. Not because of the underage (minimal because of our strict controls) drinking inside but because of the amounts consumed on the road outside. We can do nothing about that and I was disappointed to see seriously underage people drinking in full view of the police. Anyway, I don't want to hijack this thread into a completely different direction so, unless someone wants to start (or continue) an Underage Drinking thread, it's probably best left here

Not wanting to start a squabble and, genuinely sorry to hear about your problems. The Hall had been hired for a function and the hirers had no option but to close the Hall doors at 11:10pm (not midnight) as we had reached our maximum permissable number of entrants. From this point on, people leaving the Hall were told that they would NOT be re-admitted. It was unfortunate that they decided to remain in the vicinity and mix with the large number of people who were refused entry. There were 3 stewards outside the Hall and in response to their concerns, the police were called. They (the police) attended very quickly but were reluctant to disperse the crowd. If it helps, you can easily identify people who have been at any Hall fuction, They all have their left hand stamped in one of two colours for age verification. Those carrying a Black stamp have been unable to prove that they are over 18. If they have a Red stamp, they are carrying ID that proves their age as being 18 or over. If they have no stamp, they have not been at the Hall. It is my understanding that the police had told some of them to use the Legion's toilets and, again I'm not trying to cause a squabble but, as a Private Members Club, shouldn't the Legion doors be locked and manned? When I was a member (many years ago) I was issued with a key. This would have prevented anyone not entitled to access from using your loos as a public convenience. As for the carry-outs, I can't comment as we don't sell them and we don't allow alcohol in any form to be carried into or out of the premises. I don't think for a moment that it's any consolation but the same happens around the Hall, Scalloway Motors, the Fire Station and Fraser Park (and not just on Hall 'function' nghts). It's a pity that the only public convenience in Scalloway is locked up at 9pm.

I've read the reports in the local press and the comments here and I have a question. Does anybody know just how much, in total, of 'our oil money' the SIC has spent over the years? Why, because I seem to remember a Chief Executive (Ian Clark ?) telling us that, with the introduction of the Oil Funds, there would be no more Domestic/Business Rates (Council Tax ?) and that rents for Council Houses would be covered as well. Additionally, there were going to be vast improvements in other services. I would like to get a handle on this to see if the figures add up. As somebody else mentioned, the money was meant to be for the whole of Shetland and not just the Business Community.

A little overstated I think Brian. Maybe it's just a reaction to the PC Brigade trying to 'legislate' them into a particular way of thinking. Positive discrimination just creates resentment and, in my opinion, has never been and never will be the way to tackle certain 'diversities' in society. Just treat people as individuals and take them at face value, accept them for what they are.

Thought that one was for the ladies. Oh well..

Maybe it wasn't just Guy Fawkes who lost the plot..

I'm a little concerned that they are concentrating a little to much on 'motions'. Does this discriminate against the female membership?

I quite like Scalloway's current incumbent. Had a quick chat with him on a few of occasions and he seems like quite a decent straightford type. As for 'sneaky', I don't think so. If you know your local policeman, it doesn't matter whether he's in uniform or not. Far better than knocking on the station door (as I did on one occasion) to be told "I'm off duty, try phoning Lerwick". OK, I was only trying to hand in some lost property (someone's keys) but I always thought that they were never 'off duty' and the paperwork could have been done later.

Saw a pair of birds in my garden this week. About the size of a Starling White breast and rump area. Black wings Forked tail similar to a Swift but not so long. Not to well up on these things but, House Martins I think. Only reason I mentioned it was that I have never seen them on Shetland before. Are they 'common' here? Got a couple of photos (not very good) of them perched on a wire.

One young lad with a couple of passengers passed me 3 times on the street recently, forcing me to move into the side of the road. When I saw him coming for the fourth time I turned my back and stood my ground until he was forced to stop. That way I was able to give him a 'dirty' look before I moved over. Don't know if it will make any difference but if everybody did it.... Sorry if this sounds a little agressive but, in truth, I don't mind making way for someone with a genuine reason for being there but lunchtime joyriders get under my skin.

I am led to believe that the SIC currently subsidises the local bus services to the tune of around £700,000. However, rather than trying to improve the service, they are currently looking for ways to reduce this subsidy by 5% and have been 'consulting' (?) bus users. Anyone seen the form that they have handed to bus drivers for distribution? What time do you travel to Lerwick? What time do you travel home? Er.. That's it.... I can only think that they paid the forms author with bananas.. Personally, I am of the opinion that the local bus service is generally poor. It's OK if you travel to Lerwick for work but what happens; If you want to travel anywhere after 5pm? If you want to travel anywhere on a Sunday? If you want to get to the airport for a flight? If you can't take a job because work finishes at 5:30pm or there is an obligation to work overtime? Compare all this to the local ferry service (and the amount of money spent on it). The imbalance if the local transport priorities is stiking to say the least. The way forward? By all means rationalise it by reducing or stopping grossly under used services but, instead of reducing the bus service, extend it so that it's runs at times when the general public are more likely to use it and actively encourage people to leave their cars and give it a try. That way there would be more of a 'take' for the bus operators and less of a need for subsidy.

I agree with Marvin on this one. Don't blame Ebay it's not their problem. Don't blame people who auction tickets online. It's their right to sell what is, after all, their property. Don't even blame the touts.. Blame the people willing to pay the inflated prices. Without them, there would be no touts. As for Neil R. accusing touts of having some kind of 'secret' software that allows them to jump the queue when buying tickets.. Unless the 'selling' site has been deliberately enabled with a 'back door', I don't see how it can be done. I would be horrified to discover that the secure servers used for processing ticket sales/credit card transactions would/could be compromised in this way. Any proof Neil or is it just hearsay/conspiracy theory used to pad out yet another Ebay bashing story?

I don't know for sure how much, if anything at all, Sandy Cluness gets paid as a director of Smyril Line but, wouldn't it be just great if, that having benefitted from so much of OUR money being tossed into into the company, he made a donation of whatever he was paid towards lowering our Council Tax or something of some tangible benefit to Shetland otherwise the cynical around here might just think that he has had his nose in the trough.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/story/0,,1868955,00.html

Seeing as I started this thread, I suppose I'd better contribute. I have no problem whatsoever with people and their religions but, I have an intense dislike for the 'we know better' attitude presented as a defense for any kind of argument. Whilst evolution is not, strictly speaking, a "science" it's various proofs and research are based on sound scientific principles. Creationism, on the other hand, has no supporting proofs. It's not just bad science, it's junk science. What puzzles me is that so many seem able to believe in creationism whilst denying obvious evidence to the contrary.

Then, presumably, it's still in place. Wearing a different skirt perhaps but, still there. Incorporating it into another payment type is just sleight of hand. So do I but, asking someone to work their contracted hours as opposed to 'extra' hours is common sense. No private employer would willingly pay for time that they are just not getting. Hmm... I think you will find that, one way or another, we are ALL working for the council.