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Man Flu


cuckoo
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The actual medical definition of influenza is:-

 

If there were a £50 note at the bottom of your garden, would you go out and get it?

 

If you have real flu, then there is no way on this earth you would or could.

 

If you have a cold, then you would be skipping down there like a shot, sniffling as you go, but planning what to spend the cash on!

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Pandemic fear after woman catches Man Flu.

 

A woman from Stroud has caught Man Flu, prompting fears that women may have become susceptible to a new strain of the disease for the first time. Thirty-five-year-old Andrea Jennings complained of a sore throat and feeling ‘a bit bunged up’ and then instead of just struggling on regardless announced she was going to take the day off work and endlessly complain about how ill she was to her partner. It was at this point that government scientists confirmed Andrea was suffering from Man Flu.

 

‘I’ve had colds before and in many ways this very feels similar,’ said Andrea. ‘But since I realised it was Man Flu I’ve struggled to do anything more strenuous than lying the sofa watching Match of the Day DVDs and reruns of Top Gear on Dave. It’s been awful.’ Concerned that she might actually be dying caused Andrea to visit to the doctor who gave her a patronizing chuckle and informed her that she just has a bit of a virus and advised her to take paracetamol and drink plenty of fluids. Scientists say that a rare mutation has caused the Man Flu virus to spread to women for the first time, although there have already been instances of Man Flu being passed to birds. In the Far East, millions of chickens were destroyed when farmers noticed them lying in bed all day, showing signs of headaches, dry mouths and other symptoms quite similar to those of a hang-over.

 

Although police have cordoned off the area around Stroud, experts say there are now real fears that a Man Flu pandemic infecting millions of women may follow. Andrea is currently being cared for by her husband, Roland, and is thought to have originally caught Man Flu from him. ‘Andrea’s symptoms are quite similar to what I had a few weeks ago, although when I had it, it was much worse.’

 

http://newsbiscuit.com/article/pandemic-fear-after-woman-catches-man-flu-401

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how do you deal with this dreaded condition ? Whenever i get a sniffle ect i can carry on and always have done but not my better half he seems to be nearly at deaths door,any advice.

 

Heard on the BBC today no less. It is best just to rest, take it easy and let your body heal itself. The doc says there's no scientific evidence on vitamin c or anything else. So let your better half rest. Something new I learnt today as well . . . you can never get the same cold virus twice, so the more you have the less chance you have of getting one in future. That's why kids get a lot when they are young, and it's good that they do as (apparently) it helps avoid other diseases by upping their immune system. Good ol' BBC

 

Ps if you know you have a cold they said no point going to the doc! (assuming the usual no complications, etc)

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Guest Anonymous

Re. Pleepsie's post earlier.

I think the spread of Man Flu has become serious now. My partner has had it twice in the last six months.

Shö's been a miserable peerie craetir wi it.

Medical science must put all its efforts into finding a cure for this ravaging virus, before us poor men have to do any more mundane household tasks,, like washing dishes.... :wink:

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